Unbeknownst to me
she had her eyes set on me for a while,
and I just so happened to smile at her
one day when she caught my eye.
She added me on Facebook that day,
and gladly I accepted her.
She bravely sent me a message,
and I was quick to respond to her,
and in fact I was already composing
a response of my own at that time.
She wanted to hangout with me
and we did three times
in the course of a week.
She wanted to kiss and make love to me,
and all of that happened
in due time shortly thereafter.
She asked to be my girlfriend
and I told her I was already planning
to ask her in a few days.
She shared our new love to Facebook
before I was even awake the next morning.
She wanted to talk about the future
and I was on the same page.
She reassured me that it wasn’t hypothetical
and often mentioned that I didn’t have to wait too long
to buy a ring and propose to her,
so I took her to get her ring sized
and bought the perfect set of rings for her.
She wanted to eventually live together,
so I had her take a look at the rooms in my home
and let her plan for the future move.
I reminded her that once she moved in
it would be our space and our home,
so she’d never have to feel like a guest in my space.
We moved at a quick pace, but it all felt so right;
it was our pace, and it felt like fate.
She wanted me to get close to her daughter
so I tried to make a positive impact in her life.
I always offered to give them space,
but always offered to be present and helpful.
One day after dropping me off and driving away
she texted me two things:
“I love you so much” and “I miss you already”.
The very next day, her attitude changed
and I felt her love slipping away overnight.
From the moment she pursued me and added me on Facebook
she got everything that she wanted from me.
Love. Reassurance. Praise. Support. Laughter. Pleasure.
I would read to her like she’s always dreamed of,
and I would spoil her like she’s never experienced.
Early on I fell hard for her when she said her dream was to
write a children’s book one day…I had plans for us
to write one together as a Christmas surprise for her daughter.
I had so many plans for us; to show her that love exists,
that a life worth living and enjoying is possible,
and that a chivalrous guy like me is real and is hers.
When we’d make love she’d say, “Who are you?”
And I would simply respond, “I’m yours”…
she always loved that answer.
She told me that I was the best thing to ever happen to her
because of how happy I made her
and how much, with my words and actions,
I supported every aspect of who she is.
She said that she was afraid of messing things up,
and told me that I must be from a different planet
because I seem too good to be true.
Although she saw the fact that I’m flawed
and learned of my imperfections,
I still tried my best in all that I said and did
to make her life easier and happier
and to be everything that she needed.
Instead of just slowing things down for a bit
or taking some space and a moment to breathe,
and despite her constant reassurances
that she would never give up on us,
she simply gave up on me overnight.
She deleted all pictures, posts, and memory of me
from the Facebook page
where she first shared our love to the world
before I was even awake that day.
It felt euphoric that she wanted to show me off,
and it felt nauseating a month later when she tried to erase all memory of me
for reasons I don’t understand.
It’s like she was ashamed of having ever known me
when I only ever tried to bring her love and peace.
It seems like she self-sabotaged what she had
deliberately, so she wouldn’t do it accidentally.
I don’t know what more I could have done
to make her and her daughter feel loved,
but they could have had my love and support
for the course of a beautiful lifetime,
and I feel sorry for both of them to have lost me.
Oh, what a lifetime, a beautiful lifetime,
a lifetime together would have been;
just me and the girl from the gym.
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